We were created to love!
1 John 4:7 Let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.
1. We are called to bond. In Genesis 2:24, He says “they will become one flesh”. But bonding is not just a marriage thing. We are called to bond with other people as well.
In Matthew 22:37-40 Jesus says that we are to Love God with everything, and Love others as yourself. WE ARE CALLED TO BOND TO GOD AND TO OTHERS.
What are the Symptoms of a failure to bond?
Depression, Feelings of meaninglessness, Feelings of guilt, Addictions, Distorted thinking, Emptiness, Sadness, Fears of intimacy, Panic, Rage, and Fantasy.
If these are the results of a lack of bonding/ attachment, then why do we have a difficult time bonding? We remember past injuries and develop hesitancy when approaching the same situation.
Wrong thinking prevents us from bonding, and our own sinful nature prevents us from bonding. In essence, our sinful nature is selfishness. Selfishness is always disastrous to attaching.
2. Ladies ways to bond Ephesians 5:22-24 says Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing. The dictionary definition of submit is “To yield to, to serve” So what are His needs? Respect and Admiration, Sexual Fulfillment and Proactive help. God created the woman to be a help mate. In Genesis 2:18 The Lord said “I will make a helper suitable for him.” Ladies how well do you do at helping that man or do you demand from him instead?
3. Men’s ways to bond. Ephesians 5:25-33 says “Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word, That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish. So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church: For we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones. ‘For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh’. This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church. Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.”
There are three Greek words used for “love” Eros – A sexual love, Phileo – A brotherly love, and Agapao – A sacrificial love. So men, which one do you think the Lord is asking for you here? GOD IS NOT ASKING YOU MEN TO LOVE IN A WAY THAT IS EASY FOR YOU. GOD IS ASKING FOR YOU TO LOVE IN A WAY THAT IS DIFFICULT AND SACRIFICIAL. So what are a Womans needs men? Kindness and gentleness, conversation and affection, and Loving Leadership.
The goal is to bond. Bonded people… Have a better sense of morality; Are better able to handle stress, and they are more tolerant. They are not afraid to be alone, and they find meaning in their accomplishments.
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